(14th Sunday after Pentecost) (John 3:13-17)
“For God so loved the world that He gave His only-begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
What is this thing called love? Most of us would probably define love as a feeling: whether as an attraction to someone, or of affection, or of caring for someone. In our culture today, we talk about love as a feeling that can be overwhelming, and irresistible. Elvis said, “I can’t help falling in love with you.” But love based on feelings can be deceptive: what happens when the attraction fades, when the circumstances change; what happens “after the love is gone?” Is this the love that St. John the Theologian was talking about when he wrote of God’s love?
I’ve heard it said that the Greeks had five different words that we translate into English as “love.” I don’t know about five; but I am familiar with three: eros, which denotes “sexual love”; philos, which is usually translated as “brotherly love,” or, perhaps, that love that exists between friends – a “friendly love,” which is not sexual in nature; and agape, which might be defined, in one word, as “benevolence” – to be full of good will towards another, and to show this good will in word and in deed. In a way, eros and agape are opposites: both generating very strong thoughts and feelings, but where eros is physical or sexual, agape is spiritual, rather than physical. Eros is the type of love that makes you feel as if you will die if it isn’t expressed or returned; but only agape can describe the love for another that makes it possible for us to die on their behalf. It is this love, agape, which St. John the Theologian speaks of to tell us of God’s love for us.
St. Paul writes in a similar way, “But God shows His love for us in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8) This love is not a “feeling” – it is a choice. God, for whatever reason, despite our rejection of Him, despite our unworthiness, despite the fact that our sins have made us unlovely, and unlovable, chooses to love us; and in that act of love, gives that which is truly lovely, and truly loveable, His only-begotten Son, so that we might be transformed from enemies of God into His friends; transformed from being sinners into saints; transformed from a death-directed existence into persons who will live a life without death, dwelling in His kingdom in an unbroken and unending relationship of love so intense that we cannot begin to speak of it. Speaking for myself, I think we can only begin to appreciate the fire of God’s love for us by grasping the intensity of love as eros; and somehow moving from its sexual intensity to a spiritual intensity, as agape. The intensity of the love that attracts us to each other, bonding men and women together as husbands and wives, leads us from a love that begins by filling a need within us to becoming a love in which we can give all that we have, and all that we are, for the benefit of the person we love – taking this love beyond husband and wife, and becoming the love that exists between parents and children; from which then can flow love for our extended families, and our family in Christ – and ultimately to love for God, so that we can fulfill our Lord’s commandment to love the Lord our God, and to love our neighbor as we love ourselves. We love, because He first loved us. (1 John 4:19)
So there is good news for us: we are loved. Each and every one of us is loved by God. No matter what you have done, no matter how you have sinned, God loves you, and desires that you share with Him in a relationship of love; which will never end, never grow cold, never be dull. It is not a feeling; it is a choice that God has made, to offer Himself to us in love; and a choice we must make, to offer ourselves to Him in love. This is the only reason for us to pay attention to His commandments, to keep His laws: not as a duty; not to avoid punishment – for these reasons cannot give us the strength to persist when the way becomes difficult. We can only hope to succeed in following the path of the life of prayer and fasting and giving and spiritual struggle because we choose to love God more than we love the pleasures of this world, and the momentary and illusive and ultimately empty pleasures of our sins.
Brothers and sisters: Let us love one another, as Christ loved us, and gave Himself for us, an offering and sacrifice to God. Let us love God with all the fullness of our being; and let us love and care for each other, choosing to do so with the love of God, and no thought of gain or advantage for ourselves. By doing so, we find God’s love for us; and so be set free to love Him, and each other, in return.
2 comments:
I always think that the best way to understand God's love is in terms of parenthood. You know, when your kid does something that makes you want to deposit the little darling at the farthest orphanage imaginable -- but you still love him? That, I think, is how God is with us.
BTW, if you go into your Blog settings, there's a function that will keep spammers from posting to your blog. I always forget what it's called, but most of us have it by now -- "word identification," I think it is? Where someone who wants to post has to type in a word written in squiggly letters. Pain in the neck, but at least you will get honest comments.
Thanks, Meg. Comment spam hasn't been an issue here until very recently; but now I've activated the "word verification" feature for this blog. In a minute, I'll do the same for "Observations" as well.
One of the most amazing things about becoming a parent is discovering, in growing to love and care for our child, how much better I began to understand God's love. Your point is right on!
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