Why Do You Doubt?

You’ve probably heard of the “Grand Canyon Skywalk”; a horseshoe-shaped structure that extends out about sixty-six feet over a side canyon in the Grand Canyon.

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It is made of two-inch thick glass walls and floor, so that visitors may look out to see the main gorge in which the Colorado River flows through the Grand Canyon; and can also look down to see the side canyon which is 500 to 800 feet below the Skywalk. I don’t know about you, but I don’t plan to make the six and a half-hour trip to pay $75 to walk out and look down through the glass floor at the canyon below any time soon! But I think that imagining what the experience might be like might give us a bit of insight into what happens in the reading today from the Gospel according to St. Matthew.

The disciples of our Lord, some of whom are experienced fishermen, are in a boat during a storm at night while sailing across the lake on their way to Gennesaret. In the midst of the storm, during the fourth watch of the night, they see our Lord walking on the water, and imagine that they have seen a ghost, and are terrified. They hear Him say to them, “Cheer up! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” In an incredible moment of faith, Peter replies, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the waters.” Jesus tells him to do so; and Peter steps out of the boat onto the wind-tossed waves, and begins to walk on the water. He’s doing fine, until he takes his eyes off of the Lord, and he begins to sink. He cries out for help, and the Lord saves him; but also questions him, saying, “You of little faith, why did you doubt?”

Can you imagine yourself leaving the relative safety of the boat – mind you, it is being tossed about by the waves, so it’s not as if it were safely anchored – to walk on the water? Most of us would probably be so uncomfortable with the glass floor of the Skywalk that we wouldn’t even venture out there, much less try to do something as miraculous as what St. Peter attempted. As such, we need to examine our own lives, and our own faith, and ask ourselves, why do we lack even the small amount of faith that St. Peter had? We should ask, because it is clear that, if we had even a fraction of the “little faith” he had, our lives would be remarkably different.

We lack the faith to work miracles. Could it be that the reason we are not successful in the transformation of who we are and how we live is because we lack the faith needed to do so? The evidence of this can clearly be seen in how often we must confess the same behaviors, over and over and over again. Why does victory elude us? Our Lord’s question is also directed to each and every one of us: Why do you doubt?

I wish there was an easy answer to this question. I wish that there was a simple way to change the situation in which we find ourselves. I think the problem is that we are trying to “walk on water,” but find ourselves sinking into the cares and concerns of this world, as St. Peter sank into the stormy waves, because we so seldom have our eyes fixed on the Lord, Who has called us to come to Him as He called to St. Peter. We see instead the problems of this world, with all its suffering and pain, filled with hatred, disease, famine, war… We seek instead to escape from the problems with our jobs, with our families; we seek the pleasures and comforts of this world, and yield ourselves to our passions, rather than looking for the kingdom of God and the righteousness of that kingdom. When we do these things, we cannot walk on the waves of life, as did our Lord, as did St. Peter.

There is no easy answer; but I offer this to you for your consideration. God loves you. Our Lord Jesus Christ came in love to save you. There is nothing you can do to save yourself; but there is nothing that you must do to save yourself, except to do what St. Peter did as he began to sink. All we need to do is to cry out, “Lord, save me!” – and believe that He is able to do what He has promised. Then, we need to live trusting in that promise: that the power of death has been broken by His death and resurrection; that our sins are forgiven when we confess them and ask to be made clean, and whole; and that we have been given His life to live, so that we may honor and glorify Him, and find peace and rest for our souls.

Brothers and sisters, let us trust in the love of God Who saves us; and let us ask Him each day, each hour, each moment for the grace to keep our spiritual eyes upon Him, that we will not sink beneath the waves of the cares of this life, but may walk with Him through this life until we come to dwell in a life without end in the glory of His kingdom.